Illustration for article titled Netflix Announces Evangelion 4.44, Replaces Entire Previous Staff

In a surprise move that’s shocked the entire anime industry, Netflix today revealed not only did they secure the rights to the long, long, long awaited Evangelion 4.44, but the streaming service is also producing the movie as well, replacing not only the previous voice actors for the dub, but going so far as to using an entire new production staff instead. Instead of Hideki Anno or Gainax finishing off the saga, Mari Okada and KyoAni have been slated to end Evangelion instead.


Netflix was quoted for the reasoning being “Well, we replaced Spike Spencer, Tiffany Grant, and Allison Keith for the new dub we had planned, and one thing lead to another where everyone on the board ended up agreeing to basically replace everything we didn’t like. And we’ve got enough depressing anime nowadays already, don’t we? I mean, we were the ones that released Devilman Crybaby, for crying out loud.”

The move was made by purchasing all rights to the franchise from Gainax studios to the tune of $50 million, and by contacting the dark lord Satan to release Hideki Anno from the lifetime contract he had signed with the fallen angel since the 1990s. Mr. Anno was reportedly last seen singing “free at last, free at last!” While the series’s aesthetic is outside of their usual wheelhouse, KyoAni was also quoted as “Well, cute girls doing cute things have been proven to resolve any and all narratives, so we are more than up to the challenge of ending this series.”


And in other news, Madhouse studios has announced Redline 2: The Linninging. 

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