ANITAY, JAPAN - A beloved member of the AniTAY community has been accused of lying to his readers and fellow authors about his taste in anime.
“Okay, “beloved” is maybe not the word I would use to describe this guy. “More-or-less bearable” is more the type of term I would use,” admin Dexomega told reporters.
This “more-or-less bearable” author has claimed for years that the shows that he complained about in AniTAY podcasts and chats were horrible and that he hated them.
“Conception is a terrible anime made by terrible people,” he has reportedly stated on numerous occasions.
However, recent evidence has come to light that makes one suspect that he does not, in fact, think that Conception is a terrible anime. Intrepid reporters have done a deep dive into the morass that is the dark side of AniTAY. What was discovered was a mixture of strange fetishes, shady organizations, and a disgusting ideology called “Animasochism.”
Animasochism, a word derived from the terms “anime” and “masochism,” refers to individuals who actually derive pleasure from mentally punishing themselves by watching terrible anime. Believers of this ideology participate in regular rituals of self-flagellation in which they loudly whine about how bad the shows they are watching are. Other members then attempt to identify who the leader of the pack is based on who has been the most traumatized by the largest number of terrible anime.
“It’s disgusting, and quite frankly I can’t even begin to imagine why nothing has been done about this issue,” one author, who requested that their username be withheld due to fear of retaliation. “I think that they have infiltrated the deepest levels of this organization. It’s the only explanation.”
This theory seems more and more likely as more details emerge. Within AniTAY, there is a cult dedicated to Animasochism referred to as “The Order of Slaine,” a reference to the shitty character in 2014's disastrous anime Aldnoah.Zero. This cult performs numerous rituals as shows of dedication to the cause of Animasochism. They also reportedly only allow individuals who are found to have potential for corruption into their ranks. Outside of their private communications channel, the members of this cult communicate through obscure references to various anime and experiences that they assume will be incomprehensible to the general population.
“Over the past few years, the AniTAY authors’ chat has devolved to the point where it seems like all discussion of anime is done in code,” an author said. “Honestly I live in fear of the hidden references flying over my head.”
“There’s really nothing to fear from these guys,” another argued. “They’re frankly pathetic and the more secretive they are the more creepy their pathetic-ness is. They’re like some sort of de-evolved weeb who took one too many swims in the toilet bowl in middle school.”
But the organizational structure of the Animasochists is nothing if not elaborate. They even produce their own yearly publication, “The Golden Slaine Awards.”
“Honestly, I don’t give a shit what the AniTAY authors do behind the scenes, but when it boils over into trash articles like this one I get mad,” wrote one reader. “Get a life.”
Indeed, in what can only be described as a manifesto, the Animasochists claim that they seek to, “secure the curses of godawful anime” for themselves and their readers. Despite describing the anime they talk about as “godawful,” the series in the article are treated with a sort of reverence, almost as if they are holy objects. According to self-identified Animasochists that I spoke to over the past several weeks, members of the organization who watch the worst anime are treated as martyrs, perhaps even saints.
“One guy marathoned a bunch of imouto anime, and it was like he was the second coming of Jesus for a couple of weeks after that,” said one Animasochist. “It was ridiculous. Everyone knows that the visual novels I’ve played in my time are far more traumatizing.”
“This rot extends deep. These people are beyond saving, and frankly I wouldn’t try to save them even if I could,” one author told me. “Honestly every time I see them self-flagellating in the chat, it makes me want to throw up, although I suppose it still beats actually watching the garbage they put themselves through.”
The aforementioned author whose taste in anime has been thrown into question has been discovered to have deep links to Animasochism and the Order of Slaine. Although publicly insisting that he dislikes anime such as Conception, Big Order, Undefeated Bahamut Chronicle, Island, and many more, we can conclude with certainty that he actually loves these anime and finds them to be works of art. I know for a fact that he actively looks forward to the next shitty anime and plans to annoy us all with fake complaints for the entire duration of its airing. We can only hope that the tribunal set to judge him soon will sentence him to death for his crimes against humanity.